Almost impulse

So.. I kind of thrive on impulse. I love adventures to LA or San Diego on a random night. A last minute midnight showing thrills me. And an urge to cut my hair as I drive past a salon will put months or years of growing my hair out to waste in a drive home.

No, I did not cut my hair. I really am trying to grow it out.

But another impulse that I've acted on the last few years is piercings. I swore growing up that I'd never pierce my ears, because it was "way too girly". But, a summer of serving God and discovering color in my wardrobe made me decide that being girly on occasion wasn't necessarily a bad thing, and I got my first piercing in my ears. Five months later I added three more the day after marching band season ended, two months after that I got another one the day before I turned 18. Six months later, while walking through the mall, I added another one. Then randomly, a few months later, I decided I wanted two more after talking to someone at church, so I added those to one of my ears after lunch that day. Then this past February I repierced two of them that closed. Between piercings number 7 and 8, I got my nose pierced. That was a thought on Monday, and an action on Friday.

Anyways, today, I almost pierced my tongue. And not just "I really, really thought about it". More like.. I literally went into a piercing parlor with some friends, had the piercer put on gloves, had him inspect my tongue (Hey, my tongue is piercable! Which not all tongues are, for the record), and then started looking at which stud I wanted.. When I realized I really wasn't sure. Not that I wasn't sure about whether I wanted it - cuz honestly, a tongue piercing was always way more appealing to me than a nose ring (it's because I play with my tongue ALL THE TIME.. I blow bubbles, I make clovers, I twist it, I use it to display when I'm upset by licking my teeth, I bend it.. And adding something new to play with seems amazing!).. But I realized I wasn't sure what our Company Policy was on it. I knew that facial piercings were a no go (I have to take out my nose ring every day at work. The first week of having my nose ring was a week of putting my hand up to my face anyone of Director level or higher walked past my desk.. Just to help with healing), but I was prepared to argue that a tongue ring is not a facial piercing. It's a mouth piercing. And the guy at Outer Limits was even telling me that if our Policy doesn't specifically direct that tongue piercings are no bueno, that I can probably come to a compromise with Management if I approach it maturely. So, I decided it was better to check out our Handbook than to spend money on something that I might need to take out in the morning anyways.

And, unfortunately for me (while to the excitement of others, I'm sure).. Our Policy doesn't just specify that tongue piercing is not okay (and tongue splitting, btw), it goes to great lengths to cover the basis of saying no to any and all piercings outside of the ears (only two in each ear, which I often forget).. I'm not going to quote the Handbook (is that legal? I'm not sure), but it even addressed my thought that I had about maybe getting a tongue ring that would "blend in" so that you couldn't tell.. That's a no as well.

Can't show my tattoo at work, either. Which, is completely understandable. I'm really careful about that too. But I freak out on days that get hot and I throw my hair up in a pony tail.. Cuz sometimes, I think you can see the top..

I get it. A mouth talking to a client with something in it really isn't a professional look , I was (thinking of) doing it for fun. Maybe some random day when I'm the boss of myself, I'll get it, just for kicks and giggles. But for now, my mouth will remain metal and plastic free.

So it was almost an impulse. Not quite, but almost. And at least now I really know our policy. :)

Obsessed

I am absolutely obsessed with this version of "Blessed Assurance" by Enfield..

(It's not the greatest video.. But it's all I could find online.. I listen to the actual recording all day long though)

I'm the type of person that isn't a fan of change. That the way I learn something is the way that I want it to be until the day I die. It takes me a long while to be okay with the new way of something.

But I loved this version from the very beginning. It's just gorgeous.

Songs like this makes me wish that I could sing.

Most songs make me wish I could sing, actually.

Well, all songs.

But this song.

This song actually makes me sad that I can't sing.

When the Tears Fall

I love this song. Ever since we used it on Youth Sunday a few years ago with a  9/11 slideshow in the background.

Every now and then.. It hits me n a weird way.. And makes me cry.

When the Tears Fall - Tim Hughes

I've had questions, without answers
I've known sorrow, I have known pain
but there's one thing, that I'll cling to
You are faithful, Jesus You're true

When hope is lost, I'll call You Saviour
When pain surrounds, I'll call You healer
When silence falls, You'll be the song within my heart

In the lone hour of my sorrow
Through the darkest night of my soul
You surround me and sustain me
My defender, forevermore

When hope is lost, I'll call You Saviour
When pain surrounds, I'll call You healer
When silence falls, You'll be the song within my heart

I will praise You, I will praise You
When the tears fall, still I will sing to You
I will praise You, Jesus praise You
Through the suffering still I will sing

When hope is lost, I'll call You Saviour
When pain surrounds, I'll call You healer
When silence falls, You'll be the song within my heart

Feminist: I am not.

I am not a feminist in any way or shape of the word.

Well, actually, "feminist" is based on "feminism" which (according to Merriam-Webster) is 1) the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes and 2) organized activity on behalf of women's rights and interests. Wikipedia's first sentence on the "feminism" is entertaining: refers to political, cultural, and economic movements aimed at establishing greater, equal, or, among a minority, superior rights and participation in society for women and girls.

Okay, maybe I'm a feminist in one sense of the word, but even then, I'm hesitant on saying even that much. I'm a feminist in that I'm game for mostly equality. I mean, I used to be like "of course I'm game for equality".. But my cousin posted a Facebook status a few weeks ago that really got me thinking.

She posted a very gentle "Do you believe a woman should be President?". Normally, I would never respond to something like that, but it got mr thinking. Do I think a woman should be President? Would a woman be able to handle all the duties that a man could? If a woman were on a ballot, would I vote for her? And my response to the initial question was, and still is, no.

Do I believe that a woman can complete all of the required tasks and duties of a man in the Presidential role? Yes. I think we have that same brain power. There have been another nations with women in power, and they've done a great job. I think a woman can do the same job. But, her question wasn't "could" or "can" a woman be President - it was SHOULD.

1 Peter 3:1-6 calls us, as women, to be submissive to our husbands. I haven't done my research, but I'm certain that many feminists have issues with that passage... But based on that passage.. How can a woman take charge of a nation while still being submissive to her husband? I can see imagine a woman President deciding "Hey, let's go to war with Australia" and her husband saying "No, let's not".. As the wife, she should submit to his wishes. Granted, yes, discussion should ensue and they could come to an middle ground ("Who needs Canada?" ;-p), but ultimately.. What if the husband is adamant against the War on Australians.. Then he's the one ruling the nation, and not the wife.

I know that's a very dumb example, but it's the first thing that came to mind.

Actually, the first thing that came to mind was a conversation I had with a friend in high school. We talked about how women are just too emotional to be in that position, and I, as a rather emotional woman on occasion (emotional on occasion, not a woman.. I'm always a woman), completely agreed. We joked that all that someone would need to do to get the female President on your side was to bring her a box of chocolate (I also joked that I'm not a chocolate fan, so Dr. Pepper would be my weakness).

The result of me posting my opinion about whether a woman should be President caused quite a response and some super intelligent responses from people who called me dumb for "quoting such an old book".. My cousin agreed with my stance, and got so frustrated with everyone's "roar" responses that she deleted the entire status.

Anyways..

All of this has been on my mind because of a class I'm taking this semester. It's a "Women's Studies" class. And oh me, oh my.. I've only had one class of it so far, and I can already tell it's going to be a tough semester. We have a section of the material that the teacher calls "Herstory", instead of "History".. And I'm all for finding out what women have done in American history, but man. It's going to be a pain. "Ever notice how even from a young age, girls were treated differently than boys? In elementary school, weren't the boys always getting in trouble for being loud and causing a ruckus?" (My mental response: Um.. Yes. But that's because the boys were being loud and were causing a ruckus.. It wasn't a sexist thing.) "In high school, weren't the guys taking more science and math classes then the girls, which help them get higher paying positions?" (My mental response: When you're in high school, you get to choose your classes.The guys CHOSE to take those classes, the girls CHOSE not to. It wasn't a sexist thing.) "Why is the 'God' that this nation 'prays' to a male?" (My mental response: I had no words for response.. But let's do a pronoun search in the Bible.. How many times does 'He' reference God, and how many times does 'she'?...) She even started talking about how religion plays such a huge part in our culture, and how it's those "religious groups" that are causing all of the issues with abortion (Um, hi? It's murder) and with gay marriage (Um, hello again. The first definition from Merriam-Webster is "the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law". Their other definitions were added later on)..

It's just going to be a painful semester.

Why am I taking the class? I don't know. It seemed interesting. And I'm sure it will be. I'm also sure it will be emotional and frustrating. And I'm also sure God has me in this class for a reason.